Derailed

The duality of my perspective on life is starting to take an interesting turn. Things I thought were in my past seem to be showing some ripples in the calmest areas of my mind, while things I was feeling had been reined into my immediate field of view have started to slip out of focus. Oddly, my gut tells me these are mostly good. Now if only I had the bandwidth to try and shed the anxiety that comes with relative blindness. I will, for now, rely entirely on instinct (as I have little faith) to guide me to a place that can deliver at least some relative comfort, and maybe even hope. Wish me luck.

above: 'vanishing point'
---------------------------------------

As safe as the train is supposed to be, now that I take the Amtrak all the time, I am finding that trains aren't without their casualties. Twice in two weeks (this was a couple weeks ago) somebody got smooshed between Eugene OR, and Seattle, WA (to clarify, it was a train that did the smooshing). One apparently involved headphones, another a truck.

Speaking of luck... I feel lucky, in an awkward way, to be blessed with a deconstructive sense of creativity, morbid fascination with life, an obsession with the cryptic beauty of decay and a love of chaos. Why? I think maybe its because I feel that if I were to lack passion for the distasteful, and ugly truths in life I may be wooed into a more fantastic view of my very existence that would seriously compromise my ability to be honest with myself, let alone with anybody else.

And finally, a reminder that this blog has reverted back to a random assortment of thoughts, experiences, and my photo's (all photos that are not my own are referenced appropriately). For those of you who used to come her to see the latest images of bibi, you will need to go to flickr site. And remember... all random google queries are done AFTER writing the post (if you are wondering why this is important, well, think about it). In fact, lets see what it comes up with today:


Today's Random Google Query: sort opened loss
Federer blames viral infection for Australian Open loss - Tennis ...
Loss of the Homotypic Fusion and Vacuole Protein Sorting or Golgi ...
IT Resource Center forums - Open VMS 6.2 block
loss on root disk.